If only I hadn’t stopped.

I’m a dancer. I started dancing when I was about 8 more seriously, but before that I had taken a couple ballet classes. At some point I decided that ballet was too serious, too slow, too dull for my little self. And even though I continued dancing, and I still do today, one of my biggest regrets is quitting ballet.

This was especially augmented by the fact that I watched the entire season (6 episodes) of Breaking Pointe. I wish I could be as flexible and beautifully strong as a ballerina. They have strength that no one can see, and are delicate and composed on the outside. Their legs bend in every direction and when they are on stage, performing in their pointe shoes, everyone pays attention.
I’m not a bad dancer. I just trained in a different genre. But if I could become as good as a professional ballerina by starting taking ballet classes again today. I would.

You’re Back | Thought Catalog

You’re Back | Thought Catalog.

Quit playing games.

Whoever was the first smart ass to think and say ‘hm, I bet if I play some games with her head and heart it’ll be fun!’ was an idiot. If you know him/her, please let me know so I can punch them in the face.

A little bit of uncertainty is fun. In the beginning. I mean I like the whole flirting game as much as the next person. The whole I think he likes me or at least is attracted to me because he flirts with me, is fun. The butterflies, the not knowing what’s going to happen or when it’s going to happen, is a blast. I mean, although sometimes directness works, depending on how skilled you are, most of the time, when a guy is too direct I find them somewhat creepy if not completely weird.

But here is where things change. Say you’re past that whole first stage. You’re not exactly dating, but you’ve been together once, twice, maybe even three times. Through your actions it has become somewhat clear that you are legitimately interested in each other, otherwise why would you keep going back to each other? Say you can feel that your partner in crime has begun developing feelings for you, why are you still playing games?

There are two reasons why you might play games, and I will tell you why shouldn’t. If commitment freaks you out and you don’t want anything serious you might be going hot and cold, totally cuddly some days and then others you barely look them in the eye. What could you do instead of this up and down game, is talk to them. Sit them down, tell them what’s going on in your mind and your heart. Chances are that they will understand, and even if they don’t agree will respect your choices.

Reason two why you might be playing games is because you like them too and are afraid to get hurt or know that you have stronger feelings but don’t know what you want or how to deal with those feelings. You are sweet to them all the time, but avoid spending alone time. Maybe you like going out with them alone but you never show how you care when you are in public. Again why not just talk to them? Why not discuss what you want or don’t want or don’t know?

I am all for honesty. I hate when games are played because inevitably somebody gets hurt when that situation could be so easily avoided. So grow a pair and go talk to her/him, tell them how you feel and know that if they care about you, the only way to go is up.

23 Of The Quickest Turnoffs | Thought Catalog

23 Of The Quickest Turnoffs | Thought Catalog.

You gotta give a little love to get a little love.

To me this seems completely normal and necessary. You can’t expect someone to drop everything and run to your aid if you’re not willing to do it for them. I’m not only talking about lovers. This applies to friendships and family relations and even your dog. But some people don’t seem to understand the concept of a 50/50 relationship. Some people don’t understand that there is a reason relationships involve two people and not one, and it’s because both people are meant to invest equally, eventually, in that relationship.

So here I was talking to a friend and he was telling me how he kept going after another friend, trying to restore the friendship that had been deteriorating as they both moved away for college. Eventually I told him to stop trying, that he didn’t deserve to be treated that way and that whoever he chooses as friends should want to be friends with him as much as he wanted with them. And this is an advice that I heard originally from none other than my mom, because momma does know best. We have to do whatever we can and as far as we can to restore that friendship, or to keep that boyfriend, or to make sure that the people we love stay in our lives. But eventually, we can’t force them to respond equally. We can’t force anyone to love us, or want to be with us, or care about us, and so in those moments we have nothing left to say but ‘I did the best I could’ and move on. As much as it might hurt, what’s the alternative? Always run after someone who seems to be running in the opposite direction? That’s not something I want to do, I don’t want to keep searching for the company of someone who doesn’t want it.

But then I told another friend my motto of ‘you gotta give a little love to get a little love’, her answer was, ‘only you to say something like that’. What I think is that it shouldn’t be only me that thinks like that. We should all love and respect ourselves enough to expect love and care from the people we love and care. So if you are the one running after a friend, a lover, or a family member who doesn’t seem to respond. Stop running after them and find someone who will give you a little love.

19 Things You Should Do Before Going Back To School This Fall

Only a week and a half to go! Sophomore year here I come. ❤

3 more couply things that make me gag.

This is the list of things that make me gag because they are gross or inappropriate in some way or another. Two of these things are only cute when done in small doses. Most people aren’t aware that the reason a relationship tends to fall in the category of “private life” because some things ARE MEANT TO STAY PRIVATE. One of these things is just plain gross, I won’t give it away, but keep reading and you’ll see why it makes me gag.
1. Couples who make out in public

Ok so here I am walking down the mall when I spot a couple, must be n the 15s or 16s, sitting on a bench, in public, making out. And I’m talking all out, tongue in mouth, hands in hair, completely oblivious to everyone else, making out. All I want to do in those moments is throw up. Not only because I shouldn’t have to witness two kids making out, but also because they shouldn’t want me to. I am all down for a little make out session in a dark movie theater, if that’s what tickles your fancy, or a dark club, because there I don’t have to see it, and if I do happen to glance at it, I can quickly distract myself with something else. However, a brightly lit mall where families and kids are walking by, no thanks man. I’m down for some controlled PDA, like a peck here and a hug there, kiss on the cheek even on the forehead. But seriously, stop playing tonsil hockey in front of me, I don’t want to see it, there’s a reason a relationship falls under the category private life. In case you didn’t hear me the first time, it’s because some things are really meant to stay private!
2. Couples who walk around with their hand on the other’s butt

Here’s another feat that I just don’t understand. I get it, butts are nice and fun to squeeze and there is a reason that God gave some of us perfectly round and squeezable asses. But what’s with the walking around with your hand in your partner’s back pocket? Or the taking a picture with your girlfriend with your hand around her waist and on the way back to your body taking a scoop full of butt cheek in your hand? Sometimes I even see those guys that go so far with the ass grab that you can almost see their fingers touching another private part. But here is the thing that bothers me most about this public ass grabbing, it’s the fact that it calls more attention to the other’s butt. I mean if you are a jealous person, or not even if you’re jealous, you shouldn’t want someone else looking at your girl’s or guy’s butt, so then stop calling attention to it! Stop making random people on the street stare by putting your hand there.
3. Couples who pop each others’ zits

This is just plain gross. Like yellow stuff and blood is coming out of there and they you’re getting it all over your fingers and not even going to the bathroom to wash your hands. Manners people, don’t do this and please don’t do this in public. I know it’s fun to pop your own zits and all, but you usually do that in the privacy of your bathroom and clean your face/back/chest and hands straight after. I also get that you really love your significant other and you want their skin to look clean and beautiful. But let me tell you something, sometimes popping them is worst because it leaves a mark, so you’re not really making them any favors. Stop doing it, please I beg you. I actually think I might puke with this one.

What happens when conversations involve two people.

Sometimes I wish I could know the future. And I’m not talking about the future way in advance, I’m talking about the next couple of hours, next couple of weeks. I love being surprised, but sometimes I wish I could control the things that are actually a surprise and the things that I actually want to happen. I wish I had a magic wand and that every once in a while I could say make this happen, and in time, although I wouldn’t know exactly when, I would know that it would happen. I wish I could know and plan out certain conversations.

Sometimes, I like having conversations in my head with other people. Not in a crazy ‘I heard voices’ type of way. But in a way that I know what I want to say to someone and I wish they would respond the way I want them to. I imagine not only what they would say but what they would do. How they would hug me or laugh or tell me they understand and feel the same way. But what happens is that conversations are never one sided, they involve two people. And as much as I wish I could put words into people’s mouths, as much as I wish they could say the exact things I want them to stay. More often than not, the conversations don’t end up or begin where I wanted them to. More often than not, the response to what I say is not what I expected. Sometimes this unexpectedness is welcomed. Sometimes the people say what I wanted them to stay but not what I expected. These moments fill my heart with hope, they make me smile and cherish them for a long time after.

But sometimes, the conversations and events don’t go at all as I had planned them in my head. Because whether I like it or not, I’m not inside other people’s heads. I don’t know what people will say or how they will react. Whether I like it or not a conversations that involves two people, usually involves two minds and two different ideas. Sometimes these ideas converge at certain points, sometimes it is enough points that there is an agreement and we both end the conversations happy. But sometimes these two ideas differ and there is no way around it, sometimes no matter how hard both parties try to make the other understand, we have to accept that they are different and think differently.

What happens when conversations involve two people is that anything could happen.

Please don’t fall in love with me.

Please don’t fall in love with me.

You’re a great guy and everything but this is the last thing I need right now. Last weekend when we were together, it was just that for me, one night of fun and romance. I don’t want to sound cocky but I know that this is something that you have been hoping for quite some time, I still remember when we were 13 and you asked me out to a movie. At the time you were my friend’s “ex” so I gently turned you down. Now I realize that you weren’t really her ex because what you had done wasn’t really dating. Now that girl has stopped being my friend because she started hating me because of an involvement with another guy. But that doesn’t matter, it didn’t matter then and it doesn’t really matter now.

If things were different then maybe we could work out, but the way my life works right now, you and I would never make sense. You live here and I live there, I spend vacations here and you spend vacations there. I don’t know in what direction my life is going, I don’t know if I am ever coming back to live here. As far as I’m concerned, I’m staying there, to study, to work, to live. Eventually I might make my way back, but I might not. The way things work right now, you’re one of my best friend’s best friend and there is something slightly wrong about you asking her about me all the time. You’re a grown man, you can call me and ask me what the deal is. But I don’t want to go out on a date with you, much less to the movies. I am no longer 12, I no longer go to the movies with a date to make out during the entire movie instead of watching. I pay good money for those movie tickets and I intend on being 100% focused for the entire 90 minutes of film.

The truth is that you caught me in a weak moment. I like someone else, and he doesn’t seem to reciprocate my love. He did, back when I was still in school, before the summer vacation. He told me and everything. I told him how I felt and we promised to stay in touch. But after some time where I got no answer from him and came to the conclusion he didn’t want to get back together with me a month from now when I went back to school. That night I got a little bit drunk. Now you know what happens when I get a little bit drunk. I was lonely and needy and you were there. Available, good looking and sweet. You accomplished your mission. You managed to do for me what I needed at the time. But that was it and I want you to understand where I stand.

Please don’t fall in love with me. Please don’t run around telling my friends I don’t call you or answer your text messages. Please don’t expect me to go out on dates with you. Don’t expect me to be your girl. If over the next two weeks there is a repeat of the other night, then so be it. But as far as you and I both know, that was a one time thing. I don’t expect you to understand. It’s complicated, it always is. But I just want you to respect my wishes. If you really want me, just try to work around my needs. Please. That’s all I’m asking.

Where Is The Pee Hole? | Thought Catalog

Where Is The Pee Hole? | Thought Catalog.

Oh Kat George, you always know how to make me laugh, and yet be completely honest and speak the truth!